Iphone Countdown

OK, so I've held out for about as long as I can.  Which, considering how much of a gadget-nut I am is incredible in and of itself.  Those of you who know me also know that if there's a gadget I'm interested in,  I research the hell out of it, then do a ton of soul searching about how it will or won't enrich my life.  Then I go back and forth for about a year between a few options, change my mind 5 times a day, and generally bore everyone to tears talking about it.  At this point, I usually decide that I can wait, and there are more important things I can be spending time on.  

And when everyone is breathing thier collective sigh of relief that I'll stop talking about it, I buy the damn thing anyway and bug everyone some more by talking about how cool it is.

You know you love it.  

Anyhow, according to my former employer and wireless carrier, I'm eligeble for an upgrade on May 8th.  Now, I've been a good boy, and have many "insider" connections there, so I figured "Ah no problem, I should be able to slip past the upgrade date and get this thing DONE."

Nope.  

One of my best friends still works there, and I asked him to look at my account.  

"Yea bro, May 8th is your upgrade date."

Scoff!  "May 8th is the date MERE MORTALS would have to stick by.  You can get me into the iphone early though, right?"

"Yeah....no.  Apple nazis will come raid the store if we go there."

"What?  It's like a month!  The evil wireless carrier (who shall henceforth be referred to as "The Death Star") will get all that fat juicy revenue from the data plan for an extra month!"

"They don't give a hoot, bro.  Seriously, I've seen the Apple nazis at work.  It ain't pretty.  May 8th. You'll be fine."

"Gah--doesn't my account have a little box with special instructions in it?"

"I'm not see--oh yeah here it is." Woot! "It says give this dude anything he wants whenever for whatever price.  'Cept the fuggin IPHONE.  End quote."

"Argh.  Guess I'm waiting.  Unless I can bribe you with all the Kal-Bi and soju you can consume?"

"I'll take you up on that, but I gotta go with what the box says man.  Sorry."

So begins my torturous wait for the wonder-device that is the Iphone.  I feel like a kid waiting for Christmas...